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 DECEMBER 05, 2006: Featured Auction
 
 SLOP BRAND PERSONAL PEP TALK with Slop Mountain College professors ...
 

Artist: Slop Mountain College faculty Adriane Herman & Brian Reeves 

Cobwebs clogging your workspace? Racked by doubt or despair because your practice lacks clear direction or meaning? Distracted by your desire for coins, candy, SpongeBob's square pants, or the latest Beanie Babies? Plagued by guilt about indulging in formalist fantasies while your tax dollars fund atrocities?

IF YOU ANSWERED "YES" TO ANY OF THESE QUESTIONS, you won't want to miss this unique opportunity to stem the flow of negatives to your creative shores. As you may have heard, the odds are stacked against your continual identification as an active Artist. Whether you question your will or capacity to persist as a productive member of the Arts and Entertainment Industry, or find yourself going through the motions in the absence of rigorous critical feedback or kind kudos, you are likely in need of more nurturing support. Be the highest bidder & enjoy a self-scheduled tele-session of unwavering encouragement from persistent solo & collaborative makers of Fine Art products, Adriane Herman & Brian Reeves. For as long as it takes to de-claw doubts, rekindle flagging fires, or ameliorate professional or avocational ennui, Slop-eratives will employ their vast collective arsenal of long-winded academic and lay experience, responding in real-time to your spoken & unspoken needs for up to three hours. They'll relate proven strategies and extol media likely to serve your ideas ranging from nearly up-to-date technologies to long-forsaken traditions. For a fraction of the retail value, receive rigorous deconstructive & speculative critique (should you desire it) in one or more modes (choose from Pre-Modern, Modern, and Post-Modern approaches).

These broadly exhibited Certified Masters will relevantly recommend exemplary emissaries of expression. They'll even overlook an apparent lack of talent or originality -- whatever it takes to convince you to end world hunger for your own brand of Art. Bid today for this rare opportunity to capitalize upon Slop Art’s proprietary techniques for inspiring the uninspired, lessening languor, prodding the pooped who have lost (or misplaced) their spark or simply need a deadline to get something done. Even if you don't count yourself among any of these unfortunates, inoculate against statistically probable future despair by keeping a Slop Brand Pep Talk in your hip pocket. Slop Art will contact the winner to schedule his or her customized consultation. Direct any questions to: pep@slopart.com. Additional fee for Un-American telephone numbers.